A Kiss For a Kiss
by Rosepetals and Strife
Summary: For now, 100 unrelated oneshots involving Neji, Tenten, and a kiss of some sort. /Fifteen. You broke the rule, you twit. You don't kiss girls! They're covered in cooties and such! Neji's above that immaturity./
1. A Very Messed Up Fire Drill

Okay, yeah, someone had to have seen this coming. An oneshot collection. (cause every author needs one) So, if I don't get 100 by December 25, 2008, I will do something…I'm not sure what though, but it'll suck.

* * *

Oh, how she admired him.

Yes, Tenten would keep admiring until the world ended. That's how it is.

In English, she was lucky enough to sit next to him.

We all know who I'm talking about anyway. Neji, who was blessed to sit next to Tenten, that's who, I'm talking about.

Snowflakes drifted peacefully outside, looking otherworldly in the blinding spring sunlight.

And suddenly a blaring siren wailed, proudly signaling "Get the hell out; fire!"

Tenten frowned. It was thirty-fucking-degrees ("Pardon my language…") outside, not warm enough for the school to condone a fire drill.

As the class lined up and left, the rest of the class started catching onto Tenten's theory.

"It's so damned freezing! Sakura muttered, rubbing her arms.

"Quick, Best Friend, it's time to share body heat!" Ino squealed. The two girls hugged.

Tenten frowned harder. This is how she gets targeted by the gods. Did that ONE Persephone (1) joke ruin my chances of having someone to hug? 'I'm sorry Dearest Per-…' Oh Lord, now she was cold, sad AND delusional.

Tenten glanced in Neji's general direction; he was refusing sharing any heat with Lee.

* * *

That one uber-girlish recess in Tenten's mind was running on information today.

Someone must have pressed the manual override in Tenten's brain, 'cause next minute she was next to Neji. Then she said, "Double Crap, it's so cold …I need something warm. Got coffee?"

Neji looked at the girl for a short while. "No, nor do I have any Java Monster to give you a buzz."

"How do you know I drink energy drinks?" Tenten whispered, looking scared.

"Oh, you just bring some to school every day, since fifth grade." Neji said, reciting the information like multiplication tables.

"You're good. What about the route I take home?" Tenten interrogated.

"You deliberately walk through our meadow." He replied, scoffing.

"Wow, you remember, you remember _our _godforsaken meadow. You must love me," Tenten said, surprised at first, but layered on the sarcasm.

Neji squinted.

"I mean after seventh grade I thought you forgot about Lee and I!" Tenten continued, starting to ramble. "So, I guess-…" Suddenly Neji pulled Tenten into a warm hug. Tenten couldn't help but inhale the scent of Neji's shirt. A heavy hibiscus and musk collaboration of some sort.

"The heck you do that for?!" Tenten breathed.

"Tenten, a kiss, is a lovely trick design by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous. But since we're on school grounds…I decided to hug you so we aren't sent to detention…"

Tenten could ponder why he hugged her because that's affection too, but instead she-

-Kissed him.

"Freaking Ass! Look at Tenten and Neji!" Naruto screamed. Kurenai whipped her head around.

"Naruto! Detention! Tenten, Neji you two can join him after this alarm is over!" She cried.

Naruto whined to Kurenai ("What was _I_ doing?") but Tenten was embarrassed and Neji was possibly livid, in love, and confused at the same time.

* * *

"Groan, curse, and whine all you want, but we are some kind of item." Tenten said.

"Oh, I've accepted it. I'm just trying to find a way to make Lee involved." Neji muttered.

"Bad idea, my man." Tenten warned. She worked on her math homework and sipped on her Jolt.

Naruto (all the way across the room) frowned and grumbled as he watched Neji say something and Tenten smiled. The two began making out.

"I hate love." Naruto rolled his eyes.

* * *

1

Greek goddess of love.

Yeah…I partly got this idea from being stuck outside with a thin shirt on at a fire drill. The rest was a chocolate induced crack fest… to be truthful…

Review…please! All who do will get some nice Loganberry juice!


	2. Choosing Your Own Cheesy Adventure!

One review…but seriously… I don't care. (It WAS a "…" thing) I got this from my best friends, Choose Your Own Adventure books. If anyone has an idea you can share it.

* * *

Neji and Tenten stood in front of Tenten's closet door.

"We've been going steady for a while now," Tenten began, looking completely serious. "So, I'm pretty sure you should see this."

"Your…closet?" Neji asked slowly.

"No! What's _inside_ the closet, my friend."

"Clothes?"

"Shut UP!" Neji bit his lip. "Let me explain the bliss and splendor you will get once you see the contents of my closet!" Tenten moved her hands around in a mystical fashion.

"Just open it already."

Tenten stuck her tongue out, but opened the door anyway. There in all its bliss and splendor were…at least two hundred Choose Your Own Adventure Books.

Neji almost giggled at the stupidity of this situation. But most Hyuugas didn't giggle, chuckle, or snort. It was in the rulebook.

"Neji, if you laugh, I'll rip out your brain stem and play jump rope with it." Tenten warned, glaring. "Now, I've been collecting these since the academy days…Not only will I have a psychiatric disease from all of this, I'll be rich in thirty years after selling these on eBay."

"What if you die from your psych disease before thirty years from now?" Neji asked.

"No talk, more read." She threw a book at Neji. "Who Killed Harlowe Thrombey? Only Naruto reads this…stuff." Neji read the title.

"Oh, that one's just pure cheesiness. But, there's worse cheese in the world, right?"

Neji flipped through the book, having a feeling it was from before his girlfriend's birth. "Like _what?_"

"This," And with that, she quickly kissed Neji's cheek.

"Touché." Neji smirked.

* * *

This was really short. I'm hoping it was a little less crack-induced though. Enjoy, I guess.

R and R!


	3. Mon Frere and Not Pocky

Well, alrighty. Yeah, I really just wanted to write this. Oh and Strife, I lied. No Arranged Marriage short-story-not-oneshot yet.

* * *

"Mother, Father, it's 1 o'clock. Why in Zeus's name are you up? Are you two planning to do something _kinky _after I leave?"

"Your brother isn't home yet, and NO, Bellatrix." Tenten answered. "Your father is extremely irritated about Hikaru not being here yet. And we're both going on a mission tomorrow."

Outside of the door…

"Midori, you're so beautiful. I wish we could stay out later." Hikaru complimented.

The prettiest girl in all of the village, but the coldest, Uchiha Midori is blushing. Blushing at Hyuuga Hikaru, the lowly Hikaru. Oh God, he was so happy.

"Well, I think I'll let you know how I feel," And with that Midori kissed the hell out of Hikaru.

And to be blunt, Hikaru loved the way she smelled, and tasted and everything! Like coconut and Plumeria flowers.

Hikaru took in a few deep breaths. "…It's good to know you feel that way…" He grinned. "I gotta go."

"See you at training tomorrow." Midori disappeared in wisps of smoke.

Hikaru slowly opened the door with soft click. "Looks good," He whispered to himself.

The boy made it onto the first step of the staircase. Upon the first step, he sees the feet of his sister. One look at her smug face said, "You're screwed, Mon frère."

"Hikaru, explain to me why you come home at one, and I told you couldn't go at all." He heard from behind him.

"Father! I…um…" Hikaru swivled and frowned at the unpleasant situation.

"What, Mr. I'm-a-big-stwong-14-year-old can't keep track of the twime?" Bellatrix taunted.

"Bellatrix needs to go to bed!" Tenten pointed to her daughter's room.

Bellatrix departed, smiling at the world for smiting her brother.

"What exactly were you doing tonight?" Neji interrogated his son.

"Um…" Hikaru had to tell his dad what he didn't want to hear.

"Please don't tell me you were with Sasuke's daughter. Please, Hikaru, please."

"I'm sorry, Father."

"Just go, go to bed. Don't come back until I get some pocky." Neji said, closing his eyes.

Hikaru looked down, and then grudgingly pulled himself upstairs.

"…At least Midori isn't pregnant, Neji." Tenten said optimistically.

"Sex?" Neji spat, almost crying with disgust.

With that, Tenten suddenly had an idea better than pocky. "Personally, Neji, I think that, more than anything sweet, you need some _kinky…_I mean, your genius daughter suggested the thought." She suggested offhandedly, trailing a finger down her husband's chest.

Of course, Tenten wasn't going to take no for an answer. But Neji wasn't going to say no, either.

* * *

Yeah, awkward. More of a "one chaptered story" than an "oneshot" you know… either way, I hate it. And yeah Strife, it's not sparking. I don't care right now. Yeah, and if anyone asks, I gave their daughter the name Bellatrix because it sounds cool, and actually it's the left shoulder on the Constellation Orion. If it were right, it would be Betelgeuse.

Review, PLEASE.


	4. 3's and 7's

Okay…well…I do have to say this was influenced by TV and books. As is everything with me, at some level or another…

I: don't own Naruto. I: Also don't own 3's and 7's by Queens of the Stone Age. (P.S. You guys are the shit!)

Number four in a nutshell: Neji plus Tenten plus Rose's silent desperation to create something serious and unperky. Hold on to your socks!

* * *

_Lie, lie to my face_

_Tell me it ain't no thing_

_That's what I wanna hear_

_Take, a lie to the grave_

_That's what an old friend told me,_

_Look at what it did for him._

"Tonight was great, Neji. But…I've gotta jet. Training tomorrow?" Tenten said, glancing at her watch. Neji nodded, understanding. She kissed him hastily, waved, and suddenly…Tenten was gone.

_The truth hurts so bad, wouldn't you say?_

_So why tell it?_

_If ignorance is bliss,_

_Then I'm in heaven now._

The man slid to the floor, coughing up blood. The katana (that was now piercing at least two of his internal organs) seemed to leer and jeer at him. "Well, isn't this a nice way to go?" He looked up wearily at his assassin. Her grin caused the victim to feel terrified but oh-so-hot. It's double the irony when you really wanted to bang the person who shoves a sharp object through your gut.

His eyes slowly rolled up.

The girl pulled a coin out of her pocket, and placed it in the dead man's clammy hands.

She pulled him to the nearby creek, just deep enough to carry a man, and sent him off.

"I'll see you in hell," A simple flick of the wrist waved him off.

_Run, you'll never escape,_

_You see you go nowhere, so new you appear_

_Broke, laid to waste_

_Turn into sweet nothings_

_That kiss you goodbye_

The next morning, our dear Tenten wakes up at five to see Lee and Neji in her room.

"What are you two doing in my apartment?" Tenten said defensively, pulling up the covers, albeit being perfectly decent.

"Well, Lee decided you needed to be treated out for your…youthfulness?" Neji said.

Lee nodded in agreement. "I am humbled to take you out for an enjoyable brunch! And do not worry, I asked Gai-sensei to excuse us from our training session today!"

Tenten curled her lips in. "…Um, I appreciate your random…appreciation. Although I don't enjoy missing training, I'd love to eat brunch, except it's 5:29 in the morning Lee, so it's just breakfast."

"Can we go? I'm surprised we weren't hit with showers of weapons when we came in," Neji said, glancing into the white wall as if to scrutinize it.

* * *

"This was all so awesome!" Tenten commented.

"Well, we're pretty awesome." Neji deadpanned, but not without a smirk after.

The waitress came to collect their dishes. "So, you guys hear about that guy who died?"

"Which one?" Lee asked, slightly knocked off kilter from the random question.

"Well, no one's let out any real info, but I know that this dude's another victim of the so-called Coin Killer, y'know, the one who puts a coin in the dead person's hand and shoves them down a river?" She said, chewing on bubble gum.

"That's odd and sadistic," Neji said. "Well, I know that she," he paused to point at Tenten, "knows that giving a dead person a coin was a Greek tradition to help pay the toll to pass Cerberus…Maybe they're partial to gods and goddesses." Neji mused.

"Maybe, I mean, that's just kind of creepy!" Tenten said with a small shudder.

_The truth hurts so bad, wouldn't you say?_

_So why tell it?_

_If ignorance is bliss_

_Then I'm in heaven now._

It rained like a tsunami crashing down on the village.

Of course Tenten wasn't inside.

"Tenten…please don't get hit by lightning." Neji breathed. She was dancing around, fully wet and more likely to get sick or something…

Neji, also wasn't dry. He looked like a slick otter that fell into a bucket of controlled anger.

"Why don't you dance with me?" She said, and then let out a loud, "Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!"

"Okay. You need not dance! You need warmth, coffee and possibly a hug. We're going back to your apartment." Neji screamed, to no avail because his girlfriend didn't hear him. He muttered something that wasn't very nice, and threw Tenten onto his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

Neji smiled because only Tenten could be that stupid and make him feel good on the inside.

Tenten smiled because Neji would never know.

_I keep on doin' it over and over again_

_The never ending places I never been_

_No one is catching on or calling my bluff_

_The devil made me, only we never met_

_What you do is say it with a smile, girl_

_Makin' us all forget_

_What you do is say it with a smile, boy_

_Makin' us all forget_

* * *

'Scuse me, but holy shit, I think this is good for once. Hope this covers last chapter. And if anyone noticed...in the actual lyrics...it always says "say it with a smile,_ boy." But I don't care. Oh well._

_Rosepetals out._

Review…or I'll kill Neji the otter…not really…he's too cool, but do it anyway!


	5. Breaking a Katana in the Name of Love

Number five! 95 more to go!

And yeah Strife. It's a wonderful thing.

I've been moving to my new place since Wednesday. Sorry peeps.

Five: Could Neji find a cooler yet cheesier way to propose? Is it possible?

* * *

"Okay, we are not training and that worries me. What's going on?" Tenten asked, a suspicious look on her face.

"Just open the box," Neji shoved the box into Tenten's hands.

"Someone's assertive today…" Tenten mumbled. She unlatched it and opened it. And there was the most beautiful katana she'd ever seen…With a ring stuck at the bottom of the sword's shaft.

"Either you can have a katana, or you can have a ring."Neji said, shrugging.

There was a silence. "Give me a second, okay?" Tenten said, turning away from Neji. She then began tugging and pulling at the sword. Then she stopped. Then there was bending, and squeaking. Finally, Tenten whipped out an axe.

With a muffled _thump _the katana was in two pieces. Tenten threw the sharp shaft behind her, nearly missing her boyfriend's face. When Tenten finally faced Neji again, she had a grin on her face, her eyes admiring the ring on her finger.

It was then when Tenten saw her fiancé stuck to a tree.

She pulled the blade out, and pulled Neji into a kiss.

They pulled apart, with only three words needed to describe the feeling.

"I love you."

* * *

This is even shorter than the choose your own adventure one. But I really need to throw something out…

I had trouble concentrating, I think my mom and her date were like having sex…

So, yeah…whatever. See you next time.


	6. A Little Assertiveness Never Hurt Anyone

Well, I said to myself, "God, you need to get off of your lazy butt and write an oneshot." On…Monday. Today is Saturday. So, kids, here it is.

Six: Dresses! Holy CRAP!

Thanks for reviewing peeps! I loves you all!

* * *

"NO! OH MY_GAAAAAWD! _NO!"

"Oh Tenten! Come on!" Ino pleaded.

"This is blasphemy, this is bigotry, and this is favoritism!" Tenten shrieked.

"No…not really." Sakura interrupted.

"Just try it on!" Ino screamed.

The trio was in the store, attracting anything but attention. The clerk thought about reprimanding the girls for disturbing the peace, but there's nothing a normal teenage boy loves more than a pseudo-catfight. With athletic girls!

"Alright, I'm serious now," Ino took Tenten's arm and shoved her into the dressing room.

"Hey!" Ino's response was a throw of a dress into the small room Tenten was now in.

At first, there was a lot of banging and cursing, but it gradually faded into mutters and slurred sentences.

"We _so_ kick ass." Sakura said.

"That we do." Ino agreed.

* * *

About five minutes later, Tenten trudged out wearing a dress. Looking disheveled and definitely unladylike, Tenten frowned.

A full black and blue dress, hanging and grabbing in all of the right places; all of the things good dresses do on the right people.

"Holy," said Sakura.

"Crapola," finished Ino.

"Can I take it off now?" Tenten asked.

"Yeah…sure." Ino absent-mindedly replied. She wouldn't tell _anyone, _not ever, but Ino wished she looked that good in a dress.

"You're taking that dress, right?" Sakura asked after Tenten changed.

"Like I'll need it? If you want to waste money, do it for me. I mean, I'm saving up for this real cool kunai set…" At this point, Ino and Sakura's eyes glazed over.

Tenten hadn't gone home yet. She just bathed in the otherworldly twilight, and tried to see if the moon was rising or was the sun setting?

Just as the moon seized its place in the sky, Neji finally appeared.

"Neji, you're incredibly late. I'm pretty sure the time was before dark…" Neji was late for his date.

Neji raised his hand in a motion saying that it was his turn to speak. "Don't fret." Those two oddly _un_comforting word made the girl feel better.

The boy sat next to her. "Where's your dress?" Neji asked in an uninterested monotone.

Tenten blew a stream of air out. "What, is that the date status quo?"

"Not at all. It' s just that Ino and Sakura were shrieking about how good you'd look in front of me in a…dress."

"I see…it's here." She held up the bag.

"You know it doesn't matter if you wear dresses. Either way you look beautiful." Neji replied, looking up.

"I didn't know that Neji. I also didn't know that you had the Chutzpah to call me beautiful." Tenten said.

"Well…I'm full of surprises."

Tenten grinned from ear to ear. "I guess that's why I love you." She pulled Neji close and gave him a slow long kiss.

* * *

Well, that's it. Ideas and stuff are always welcome. )

Okay. Yay.

That's bout it. Enjoy.

R and R!

Rosepetals Out.


	7. Lessons in Awkwardity

Seven: Neji's got some news. Big news. Real big news. And Tenten isn't happy. Or is she?

Ideas happily accepted. SERIOUSLY.

Warning: Somewhat based off of the book Wicked, which I don't own.

* * *

Hyuuga Compound

Wednesday

10:30 P.M.

"Nice to meet you, love. My name is Meiriitsu Honokari. I am the daughter of Meiriitsu Akiyama, feudal lord of the Grass Village."

"The pleasure is all mine." But there was no pleasure in Neji's voice.

Akiyama smiled proudly, shipping off his daughter to some wealthy man in a marriage sure to end in homicide was an awesome idea.

"I imagine the next few days will be quite enjoyable, love." Honokari said, smiling.

This 'love' thing she was doing wasn't cool. Neji knew that if Tenten said 'love' after every sentence he wouldn't mind much. Hell, if anyone besides Honokari did it, he wouldn't give a flying fish about it.

"Yes, well…I will retire for the night. Excuse me, Hiashi-sama, Honokari-san, Akiyama-san." Neji wheeled around and quickly departed, leaving the Meiriitsus and Hiashi in the parlor.

* * *

Training Grounds

Thursday

6:00 A.M.

"So Neji, you wanna go help me clear my temple, after training? Oh! Then we could give an offering to Aphrodite!" Tenten suggested, jogging next to Neji.

As absurd as the request was, Neji would usually help out with Tenten's Greek rituals. But not today…

"Uh, no… I can't help you out. I've got some errands to, uh…run."

"What are you hiding from me?" Tenten said sharply.

"What? NO! I hide nothing." Neji replied quickly.

"When Neji says 'Uh…' he lies." Tenten said. She got a deep probing look in her eyes, as if she were delving into his mind and switching the books on his proverbial bookshelf.

"Okay! Okay…Tenten…I'm getting married."

"Oh. That's a good reason to miss a ritual with your girlfriend. That's a very good reason." Tenten said, scarily serene.

"Tenten, I didn't know until now. I'm just as surprised… Are you going to kill me?"

"Yes, Neji, I'm going to kill you. Just for a different reason that I planned. But anyway-may I meet your bride? I mean…me and you Neji-kun, _best friends_! We'll be seeing each other more often." Tenten said decisively, ripping any traces of _boyfriend_ from the sentence.

"Tenten…Not a good idea. Not a good idea." Neji said, but to no avail, Tenten had already jogged ahead.

Training had ended, and Lee and Gai were on a camping excursion for the weekend. Tenten glided gracefully towards Neji and wrapped an arm around him, securing him in her grasp.

"Neji! I'm completely ecstatic to meet your girl! She must be so polite, so wonderful, lovely too?" Tenten cried daintily, clasping her hands together near her face.

Neji was as tense as ever. In a sense it was the same feeling he got before he played Duck Duck Goose with the team, or the first time he and Tenten made out.

Honokari stood at the gates, fully expecting Neji, but not the woman with him.

Neji sounded as if his voice had been pulled away from him. "Honokari-san, meet my esteemed teammate, Tenten. We'll go have that picnic now. Let's depart."

Tenten surreptitiously sized Honokari up. Her hair was an amazing shade of teal. She was flat and flexible, wearing clothes that Tenten would never wear -take your pick of unwearable clothes- She wore no makeup, and brushed her hair into the straightest style.

Their eyes met and Tenten glanced away, finding Neji more interesting.

"Nice to meet you…Tenten. I imagine we will have a grand time, love." And with that, Honokari picked up a basket and brushed the dirt off of her skirt. She scurried ahead to talk to Neji.

"Honokari will get nothing but the best from Neji's _best friend_." Tenten muttered, sashaying to Neji and Honokari.

* * *

Izakari Field, near the Timberline of Izakari Mountain.

Thursday

2:30 P.M.

"So, what is your opinion on law-based propaganda?" Honokari inquired, daintily eating a finger sandwich.

"I believe it is an unfair but necessary part of society." Neji said.

Tenten kept quiet, picking a Mountain Pea out of the grass. She ripped the head off of it, smirking.

"…Tenten?" Honokari called.

"Hmm?" She replied lazily.

"Your opinion. Your opinion on growing orchids?" Honokari said, smiling.

"Err; I believe orchids are a very finicky breed of plants. Hard to take care of…I think that they're very hard to take care of. But, uh, very beautiful." Tenten stammered, throwing the stem of the decapitated Mountain Pea behind her.

"Yes. I agree, love." Honokari said.

There was a long silence.

Neji looked at Tenten and suggested, "Tenten-chan, tell Honokari about your Tarot Cards."

Tenten shot a look of anger towards Neji, but he wasn't visibly affected by the glare.

"Um, well…I have the Major Arcana…They're very useful though." said Tenten.

"For _what? Divination, love? _Some other poppycock?" Honokari cried, laughing.

Tenten was visibly shaken by Honokari's debunking of Tarot Cards.

Tenten pinched Neji's hand and twisted the skin cruelly. Neji glanced at Tenten but made no outcry of pain.

"Yes, but…" Tenten trailed off angrily. She let go of Neji's pinch and snaked her fingers around his lovingly, obviously. "Oh, my dear Neji…married life will be wonderful! I'm so happy for you. I'm so happy."

"Yes, but the wedding is God-knows-when. We aren't sure." Neji said, referring to himself and Honokari. He pulled his fingers away to disengage, but it felt as if to say, "You can touch my hands later…" Tenten let him go.

"Yeah! Well, I can't wait until you meet Lee and Gai-sensei! Both cards, one of a kind!" Tenten suggested, smiling at the thought of Honokari getting heat stroke from too many push-ups on a 105 degree day.

"I'm sure it'll be a wonderful time, assured, love." Honokari said.

A long silence joined them at the picnic. "So…what's your favorite flower?"

Neji said, "I enjoy Hibiscus, though I do like Encyclia Orchids."

Tenten said, "Hawaiian Plumeria and Bergamot are quite fragranced."

Honokari said, "I enjoy Cestrum Nocturnum; Night Blooming Jasmine…or maybe Jasminum adenophyllum; Princess Jasmine? Or, or Beaumontia grandiflora, very rare! What about…Allamanda Cherry Jubilee? All very nice, love!"

"Hmm, good choices…" Neji muttered, not even close to knowing what a Beaumony-brandy-floor was.

Another awkward conversation was about to be engaged when a noise startled them.

"Let us continue our hike, Gai-sensei!"

"Yes indeed, Lee!"

Neji and Tenten rolled their eyes. Honokari looked up in surprise at the voices.

Two green clad men popped out of some bushes. "Neji! Tenten!" Lee froze. "You…" He began. Lee bent down and kissed Honokari's hand. "My beautiful flower, tell me, you haven't graced me with your presence before?" Lee cried.

"No, I'm afraid not, love." Honokari said blushing lightly, which looked like a guillotine's outpour of blood hitting a white poster board.

"Oh, well, that will just have to change! Why don't you and I go and get some ice cream?" Lee suggested.

Honokari glanced at Neji and Tenten. "Err, sure, love! I'd love to join you…Lee." Honokari futilely said, being pulled away by Lee.

Gai stood in Lee's wake, grinning.

"Oh, young love! It's so nice to see the flowers of youth just blooming in you kids!" Gai began, and Tenten put her hand on her lap instead of anywhere remotely near Neji's. "Our trip wasn't over yet, but I'll just have to go challenge Kakashi to a Styrofoam cup eating contest! Good day!" Gai cried, disappearing in a poof of smoke.

"Wow…um…now what? Your fiancé's gone off with Lee, Sensei's going to kill himself eating Styrofoam, and we're here." Tenten said slowly.

"Well, I'm starting by telling you about how we'll always be together, no matter what." Neji replied monotonously.

"You're trying to sound cool; Neji, but I can hear the sweetness in your voice." Tenten giggled, poking his nose.

"Well…" He began.

"Nah, don't say anything." Tenten whispered, grinning. With that, she pulled him close and kissed him.

* * *

Big long wait, huh? So…not my best, but…just writing.

Besides, isn't this what this is all about, getting better at oneshots?

Cookies and Tie Dye Shirts

Rosepetals


	8. A Future For Squares

So, like, are people ACTUALLY reviewing, or is this some horrible joke?

Thanks for anything that made me feel good on the inside!

But specifically:

_Truth Lies and Pain: _-insert awkward moment- You know, after a while, that came to me. I'm pretty embarrassed though, cause I'm a Greek Mythology spaz as well…but then again, that was written after two cans of root beer at midnight. 'Scuse me! If I get some enthusiasm, I'll change it. Thanks for telling.

_Kannika: _Y'know, me neither…but I felt I couldn't just throw…like…Ino in and whip out a plot for an oneshot. Even though I love Ino, can you imagine:

"You guys are betrothed from birth. Your wedding is in three months."

"Ehmygod! That's so uncool! Daddy!" Ino cried.

"Ino, be mature about this. Neji's a…err…charming boy."

'Nuff said.

_Daddy's little Hippy: _I do love that line… I use it on people I know all the time…It's beautiful…isn't it?

Eight: Tenten never really wanted to see this. How could she control _this _though? So…it's definitely not her fault.

* * *

"It's rockin', it's awesome, and it definitely _not _going to be rolling, it's…" Tenten sang.

Neji sat emotionless. Tenten ignored this.

"MY BRAND NEW CRYSTAL BALL!" She pulled a knitted cloth off of the globe. The ball sat on a gilded stand covered in flowers. It seemed to be the most clear, pure, crystalline object Neji or Tenten ever saw.

"Okay, now what?" Neji asked.

"_Now, _we look into the future." Tenten said, as if Neji couldn't speak English.

Tenten closed her eyes and placed her hands on the glass ball. She sat for about fifteen seconds doing nothing, at least that's what it looked like. Neji began to raise an eyebrow, but Tenten sharply cut him off. "I need no negative thoughts from you, Neji." Tenten began her odd silence again.

Neji took the time to admire his teammate, her long brown hair, (which was down for _some _reason, but Tenten obviously hadn't noticed if there wasn't a reason) her completely down-to-earth look, her perfect… 'I wasn't going to even think about that,' Neji though, wiping the thought out of his mind.

Tenten spoke again, but her voice was distant, as if in a trance,

"Future that is to come

Future you can't stay away from

What can you see?

Crystal ball-What is your decree?

Negative and Positive

Swirl with all-purpose

Even see the abhorred and unwanted

Clear the way

And see

So mote it be!"

Neji was beyond captivated now, not like he'd tell a soul. The crystal ball seemed to be filled with smoke and fog, seemed to quiver and pulsate. Tenten opened her eyes, but kept her hands glued to the ball. Then the smoke clears.

A girl, a girl neither Tenten nor Neji knew, only recognizable by her pale, lavender eyes.

"Neji…you got a sister?" Tenten asked slowly.

"No, no, I don't have a sister." Neji replied, just as slow.

"What about cousins? Any extra cousins?"

"No. Sorry."

"So, maybe…that…that…girl…is…"

"That's not possible." Neji said. Just then, the crystal ball shuddered and the picture changed. It showed an older form of Neji and Tenten...doing some inappropriate things.

An odd silence took its place in the room.

"Apparently, it is possible Neji." Was all that escaped Tenten's lips.

"Tenten…this isn't rigged, is it?"

"No, I channeled it with my own chakra and energies. Were you thinking of anything…inappropriate? While I was channeling…did you?"

"Hn." Neji said, finding the ceiling more interesting.

"You did. I cannot believe you! You're such a pervert! I liked it more when you thought about me bashed into the ground!" Tenten cried, not taking a breath.

"Well…Well…Well…The future is for squares." Neji complained quite un-Neji-like, folding his arms.

"Please, Neji. You're one to talk about the future. Meh." Tenten replied, rubbing the ball, distorting the image. She placed the cloth back onto the ball.

A pregnant silence fell.

"So…" Tenten mumbled.

"So." Neji replied. Neji pulled Tenten close and kissed her.

* * *

Well...I'm not sure how I wrote this or where it came from.

Oh well. Read and review. Oh and, I didn't really check my wtiting... so excuse me for any language mistakes.

-Rose


	9. Marigold

Nine: A little creepy...

That's about it.

Warning: Neji sobs.

_Whoa._

_Whoa._

_Whoa._

Time was slow. Time was deliberately slow – just for him.

Tenten lay limp in Neji's arms. She was still alive. Neji was so stricken that he couldn't react to the poisoned kunai jutting from Tenten's stomach. He snapped back into reality and looked, trying to access the situation. Neji ripped off part of his robe as temporary gauze and quickly pulled the kunai out. Tenten made a noise that would have made him laugh anytime except for now.

Another dead enemy fell limp next to Neji. "…We have to get you somewhere safe." He picked her up and threw her over his shoulder and proceeded to run-not jump- towards safety.

Where was safety, anyway? Neji was frantic. To his relief, a dark cavern was graciously placed in the dark forest. Neji ducked inside and laid Tenten on the cold rock floor. Her body shuddered at the sudden temperature change.

"Tenten. Tenten, can you hear me?" Neji asked quietly. No response. Something was missing. Something he needed. Thoughts flooded into his mind.

"_Neji, Lee, aren't these flowers wonderful?" Tenten said, plucking a marigold out of the ground and sniffing it._

"_Yes, Tenten, you'd know because you are definitely the flower of our team!" Lee said, bending to sniff a marigold himself._

"_Right you are, Lee," Gai nodded. Then he glanced in Neji's direction and gasped. "Neji, you little vampire you, come out into the sun! It's beautiful out here." Gai reprimanded, voice still filled with glee and utter Gai-ness. _

_Neji rolled his eyes and pulled himself away from the shady tree. Then he sat in the space where no flowers grew, not looking very happy, but nonetheless enjoying that human love of just sitting outside. _

_Tenten leaped into the flowerbed unceremoniously next to her emotionless friend. "Don't you love flowers, Neji?" _

_Neji sighed. "Who are you, Ino?" _

"No_," Tenten replied dragging out the _o _in 'no' childishly. "I just think flowers are very useful things. Did you know that the Calendula or marigold is useful for helping wounds heal and flushing out toxins?" _

_Neji decided he'd make Tenten's day. (He always did.) "No, I didn't. Thank you for enlightening me with your infinite knowledge."_

_Tenten ignored the not-so-subtle undertone in Neji's voice. "You're welcome, my friend." She threw herself backwards and landed in the marigolds. Neji smirked, the kindest smirk Neji could muster. _

_Tenten pulled herself up and placed the marigold in Neji's long, silky hair._

"_You look beautiful now." Tenten said decisively, grinning._

"_Great. Now, I'm pretty." Neji said. For this, Neji not ripping out the flower was really making her day. _

* * *

"Marigolds. I need marigolds." Neji muttered. He thought about where he was. The outskirts of the Land of Fire. He could find marigolds here. But he couldn't leave Tenten here. Why couldn't Lee or Gai-sensei come on this mission with them?

"Please Tenten…please." Neji said, over and over, gently putting her head onto the floor. He departed.

Neji looked around, the intense rain blotting his senses. He cautiously looked around for anyone, and then focused his search on the orange flower.

Neji became tense. Neji became pessimistic. Tenten was going to die, not because of the enemy, but because of her stupid teammate.

He sat and fell onto the soft ground, and fell into a soft patch of orange, yellow and red.

Neji pulled whatever was in the ground and threw it with an angry _fwipp _on the ground. The dejected marigold lay, battered by the driving rain.

Marigold.

Marigold.

Marigold.

Neji picked up a pile of marigolds. He had two days to nurse Tenten back to health before Tsunade would be suspicious.

Neji arrived and Tenten lay, unchanged, seemingly sleeping. She moaned and shuddered.

"This poison must be a neurotoxin…" Neji listened to her pulse. Slow. Beat……Beat……Beat. Slowly shutting her brain down, putting Tenten into a comatose state…and eventually death.

"I know I'm supposed to dry these first…but anything wants to keep you living…it will work." Neji crushed the petals and placed them under the gauze.

Now all the omnipotent Neji could do is wait.

And he did.

He was alone-in the sense of the word- at some unknown time in the middle of the night. It was different. It was different not having anyone to even look at him. To scoff, to look up to, to look pretty to. Tenten breathed, then made a noise, then exhaled.

Neji couldn't take it. His strong figure racked with sobs as he tried not to cry like Tenten would.

Neji stopped himself. "Tenten…if you can hear me…if you can…if you go…" He sobbed. "I don't want to look like the sensitive moron I must seem like right now. I just wanted you to know…that…I love you." Tenten racked with slow shallow movements.

Neji looked up, feeling Sakura-like and stupid. He sighed. Tenten turned over, facing him.

"Oh…you're moving…I guess you're getting better."

Tenten's hair had fallen apart, and lay disorganized about her face. The hair framed her face, and he wished that Tenten would wear her hair down more often. Her features were relaxed…never as relaxed as he'd seen before.

"Neji…Neji…" Tenten murmured. "Tenten! Tenten can you hear me? You can speak?" Neji said, regaining his composure.

"Neji…Neji…"

"Figures…you must be in some dream-like state." Neji's body lost its tense excitement.

Neji fell asleep, heavy with thoughts of things.

Neji woke up, with a face looking wearily at him, but quite dreamily.

"Tenten? Tenten…you're okay?"

"Um, yeah, I just took a nap after that brutal fight!" Tenten replied, waving her hand. Apparently she had no clue that she almost died.

Let's state the obvious. "Uh, Tenten, you got hit by a poisoned kunai and you went into a comatose state."

"Uh…whatever. Man, I'm beat. You wanna head back to the village and-" Tenten was cut off by the unexpected hug given by Neji.

"Neji…uh…are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

"Ooh, marigolds! For me? So sweet, Neji dearest!" Tenten cried, swooning. She took one and put it in Neji's long hair. "You look beautiful, now!" Tenten added, smiling weakly.

"No, you'd look better." Neji said, pulling the flower out of his hair and placing it in Tenten's.

"Well…maybe." Tenten said, kissing him.

But we all need oxygen.

"Let's get back to the village. We'll make apple cider. You need it." Tenten reassured.

"Sure," Neji agreed, stepping out into the sunlight.

* * *

Another sad attempt at writing seriously.

Sob.

Well, anyway reviews are welcome.

Ideas and requests (within reason) are happily accepted.

I'm desperate…but I'm feeling like werewolves, so that's what'll probably happen next.

-Rose


	10. Sides of a Circle Part I

Ten: Secrets about friends are bad. Secrets between friends are necessary sometimes. Secrets kept between friends and away from anyone else is plain lucky. But they pull it off flawlessly.

This one is pretty long. Actually, this may have a continuation of three or four chapters…all at random times.

Now a message from the author:

_Oh noes…the espionage chapter. Ya'll see it coming. _

_Holy flipping crap, I have ten chapters and I haven't deleted this story-thing!_

_OMG! But anyway…I wanna thank you peeps and Strife for reviewing cause without you, this story would have died. Right now this is all I'm working on, but since I have no plot to go from it's hard to come up with mostly un-clichéd oneshots._

_So…um…free chocolate chip muffins for everyone who _reviewed. _It's nice to be alerted and favorited…but reviews are better. So if you really care, please read, then clicky-click the purple button._

_-Rose, your NejiTen obsessed author._

_P.S.- Thanks Kannika! Also…if anyone tries to PM the profile –just letting you know- it'll go to Strife, not me, so yeh._

_P.S.S.- Sorry for any missing lines._

* * *

Neji and Tenten sat on top of a building.

"So, we have exactly fifty-two minutes, forty-two seconds and twelve milliseconds to accomplish this mission."

Neji nodded, but in case no one saw him he added an "Aa." (A/N: "Aa." Is more of a Sasuke thing but…oh well.)

"Well…could you respond in a somewhat human manner?"

"YES. We'll leave soon."

"Come back to my apartment. I have to change." Tenten said.

Neji shrugged, as if to say, "Why not?"

* * *

Neji was taken aback by Tenten's outfit.

(A/N: If you don't want to read this stuff, feel free to skip to the next paragraph.)

The dress was tight at the top, having thick straps connected to the dress with two black buttons. The top was white and gray striped. A large ribbon cut the torso and below into two sections. The bottom was long, wavy, gray, and stopped at her calves. Tenten's eyes were shadowed purple, and her hair was in one beautifully messy bun.

If this were anyone else, Neji would tell them that they looked like some sailor girl.

But Tenten was a smart, _sexy_, sailor girl.

"You look…good." Neji choked out. "Uh, why is your hair in _a_ bun?"

"I don't know…it matters?" Tenten waved her hand. "And two, so do you Neji, _beautiful as always."_ Tenten said jokingly. She wheeled around and opened the door.

How did she just compliment him (even with the sarcasm) like that without feeling like he did about the compliments?

"Well, we have things to do! Come along, little misguided Neji." Tenten chided, grabbing his hand and pulling him with her.

* * *

A large ballroom on the south side of Konoha

1900 hours

The duo stood outside of a building. Tenten peeked into a window, and Neji sat under a wall next to Tenten. He fiddled with his watch.

"Our suspect is in here. I will charm her and you will take the other one down, and hack into the mainframe. I'll join you soon thereafter."

Neji stopped and looked up. "Um, Mizukari Lira is, last time I checked, a woman."

Tenten looked at Neji, her lips in the thinnest line. "Our jobs call on for desperate, awkward measures. Just do your job…and what are you messing around with?"

"The radioactivity levels in this place are off the chart."

Tenten raised an eyebrow.

"Oh? You don't have a built in Geiger counter in _your _watch? Hmm." Neji intoned.

Tenten ignored this. "Well…that's some completely redundant information, Neji. We're splitting up now." She left him there.

Tenten entered the building casually sifting through people dancing. A small band played swing music. Neji was behind her.

"Neji…you go the other way!" Tenten scream-whispered.

Neji shook his head. "We're dancing, just in case one of us gets a fatal blow to the spine or anything." Tenten nodded in understanding and slipped her gloved hands into Neji's. Tenten put 

her head in the crook of Neji's neck. "You know we aren't supposed to have these romancing things, Neji-kun."

Neji cut her off. "Agent 46, my dear."

"Agent 46-kun, then. We can't do it. People can't love and be secretive at the same time. It gets people killed. Lots of people."

Neji smirked and shrugged, swaying to the beat with Tenten. "Well, yeah, if you think about it like that, somebody ought to die."

Tenten lifted her head and looked at him, not enjoying his joke.

"Look Tenten," Neji began.

"Agent 77…" Tenten said.

"Whatever. I love you and you love me. That's all that matters. Now…there's Lira, go seduce her or whatever you need to do. I'll get past the guards." Neji said, and kissed her.

Talk about role reversal?

Neji departed, suddenly disappearing from view, mixed into the crowd of snobby upstarts.

Tenten shook her head and followed the entourage of Mizukari Lira. "Lira? Oh my God! You're so awesome. Can I get your autograph?" She yelled.

"Get in line, honey 'cause…" Lira paused to look at Tenten and stopped. "Oh, my…aren't you pretty?" She crooned.

"Oh? I am?_ I_ _am_?" Tenten said, confused.

"Yes…you are. Why don't we go into the foyer and talk about it." Lira said.

Tenten got a look of surprise (only almost to the level of mock) and suddenly understood. "Ohh…mmm. I could talk about it with you."

Lira motioned for Tenten to follow her. Tenten obeyed.

* * *

Neji stared…maybe glared…at Agent 77 going with Lira. "Phase One of Operation Snake Charmer complete." He muttered, folding his arms, looking at his watch.

1909 hours-minutes

Barometer: 6 mph

46 minutes until mission ends

Knockout gas flavor: tropical fruit

Geiger: ??

"I wonder what happened to the Geiger counter," Neji mused. He thought as he walked casually through restricted hallways. Neji looked up seeing a camera staring at him. He pressed a button on his watch, launching a miniature harpoon into the camera and through the wire, shutting it down. He snaked against a wall checking the corner, seeing three guards patrolling a door, gilded and archaic. "God…" Neji whispered. "Too easy these days. Too easy."

Tenten sat there, trying to look confused and innocently sexy. She sat cross-legged on Lira's bed. When Lira returned, she was wearing considerably less than her evening dress. Tenten looked a little frightened. She manipulated her voice, making it dry. "Oh…uh…Lira-san. You uh…" Tenten began, averting her eyes from Lira's piercing green ones.

"So…my little poppet, what is your name?" Lira said, somehow throwing seductiveness into a simple question.

"Uh…my n-n-name? My name i-i-i-is Kari." Tenten stuttered.

"What a beautiful name…suits a beautiful girl like you." Lira said, sitting down next to her.

Tenten couldn't help herself but look. Lira only wore a robe and a very risqué nightgown. Her long chocolate hair cascaded down her back and her porcelain features reminded Tenten of Marilyn Monroe with brown hair. She envied Lira; Neji would just worship her like a goddess if she had the looks.

"So…uh, what am I in here for?" Tenten asked, knowing full well anyway.

"I think you know," Lira said, and cut off any further conversation with a kiss.

Now, in any other situation, Tenten would have pulled away and slapped Lira. She told herself a mantra. _If you complete this mission you'll be promoted. So don't break away. Complete the mission. Don't break away. Just go along with it and it'll all play out. Complete. Don't break. Go along. Complete. Just relax and pretend it's Neji. Don't break. Go along. Pretend. Complete._

Lira pulled away and Tenten needed more time. She needed to give Neji enough stall time. Tenten already knew that no one would bother someone as promiscuous as Lira Mizukari when she's in a bedroom with someone.

Tenten prayed that they made this mission, or Tenten wouldn't be a very happy agent.

* * *

Neji had managed just slipping past the first guard, knocking him out with a silent swipe of his hand. He held the guard's limp body, dragging him and throwing him into a closet. Neji must've done something too loud, because the other two men in black were staring him straight in the eyes.

"Hello my good men, what brought you here to this party?" Neji inquired, brushing dust off of his suit.

"This area is restricted, _my good man." _The guard said mockingly, towering over Neji by a good two feet.

"Oh, I'm aware," Neji said, now fixing something on his watch. "What're you doing?" The man said gruffly, looking at the smooth man in the off limits area.

"I'm sorry, but I can't just seem to fix the time on my watch. Can you smart men fix it for me?" Neji asked, putting his arm out. The two men peered over the arm and looked at all of the shiny buttons. "Which one do we push?" One said stupidly.

"Uh, try the blue one?" Neji guessed. One of the guards pushed it and a burst of blue air came out.

"Fruity…" A guard said, clumsily slinking down and then falling over. The other one followed suit.

"That it is. That it is," Neji agreed, stepping over their unconscious bodies. He proudly opened the boldly place doors just to find…another hallway. He sighed, pressing a button on his watch.

Tenten had been doing this thing, as she'd like to refer to the situation as, for about half an hour now.

Complete.

Neji -officially- should be far enough to have her end this. Tenten punched her in the stomach.

Lira flew backwards and landed on her feet.

She kept her cool, no matter how bad everyone else would look here. "So, you're the infamous Agent 77…" Lira said, cracking her spine.

"You've heard of me? So flattered," Tenten said, visibly angered that Lira wasn't hacking blood yet.

"I've heard many things, my dear. Maybe that you're the most conniving agent in all of Konoha. I've also heard other things…" Lira said, looking up, beginning to walk towards Tenten.

"Like what? I'm curious." Tenten replied moving forwards.

"Well…I hear that you've been getting on very nice with your partner in crime, Agent 46? Is it true?" A step forwards.

"No. And-and aren't you doing the crimes here? Besides anything anyone'd let your ears hear…it must be something ridiculous." A step forwards from Tenten.

"Ohh? Is that some hesitancy I sense?" A step for Lira.

"No, besides your stupid rumors aren't my problem, lady," Tenten said, scoffing. "This ends now. I can kill you with anything in this room. You want to be murdered by this newspaper? That'd be a painful end."

"I'd love to see," Lira said.

"Nah, that'd be too hard to explain to the Chief." Tenten said. She picked up a glass and pitched it at Lira. She leaned over and the glass shattered against the wall into a lot of pieces.

Tenten frowned and picked up her estimably expensive lamp and threw it at Lira. That missed too, exploding into a million pieces.

"You're missing. You've killed all of my sisters with one blow. What happened?" Lira mocked.

"Nothing…I've been working with the analysts back at Control on my strategizing skills." Tenten said, pouring a pitcher of spring water onto the tiled floor. "Alright, O Majestic One, hit me up."

Tenten figured she only needed hand-to-hand combat for this bat. (A/N: pun partially intended.)

Tenten punched Lira in the face while Lira retaliated and threw a punch at Tenten's gut. Tenten dodged, trying to push Lira on to the ground. She slipped away staggering back. Lira came back and pinned Tenten by one shoulder on the wall. Her other hand was uncontrolled, moving freely down her face and chest to her stomach, and she suddenly punched her in the gut, completely winding her. Tenten wheezed, and tried to shake out of Lira's surprising tight grip.

"You're so beautiful," Lira said smirking. She punched Tenten again. "You're smart too," Another punch.

Tenten wretched of Lira's grip, decking her square in the face. Not missing a beat, Tenten pushed her down, and pulled out a knife. Tenten slashed and gashed at Lira, making small cuts in her skin and clothing. Lira got past a few of the slashes, but she slipped on a piece of glass, falling comically onto the tile floor unconscious.

Tenten stood for a minute observing her victim. "Sorry, dear. I've got better things to do." Tenten muttered, walking away.

* * *

Neji stood there in the hallway looking, analyzing. There was a grand hallway leading to a grand door that obviously held the main computer. Neji wondered how he should go about this when a hand touches him. "Agent 46, so good to see you, my darling. Shall we continue?" Agent 77 said, poking 46's shoulder.

"Yes, well, do you think this hallway is rigged?" Neji mused, hand on his chin.

Tenten pulled out a container of eye shadow and threw it at the ground, causing it explode and smoke in a purple haze revealing several red lasers. Tenten threw on an expression of mock surprise. "What? _You _don't have Infrared Ray Seeking Eye Shadow? Hmm…" Tenten intoned.

Neji muttered something and folded his arms. Tenten grinned and raised a finger. "Watch me carefully, and we won't set the alarm off." The petite brunette proceeded to do a series of complicating twists and turns and acrobatic moves. Neji coughed.

Tenten waved as a signal for Neji to come on. He jumped onto a shelf and crawled to a bookshelf, then jumped onto a chandelier swinging and leaping next to Tenten.

She pouted. "It would impress me if you actually went through the lasers."

"Oh well." Neji said flatly.

Tenten rolled her eyes and opened the door, slipping inside silently. She looked at a finely furnished room with a single computer. Neji followed, immediately going to the computer. Tenten stood near the door.

Neji had clicked his way into Control Panel, clicking on an icon called "Op.Snake.Chaos.exe" It brought up a window saying "Access Code?" and a pad emerged from the computer.

"Crap…I need DNA and a code," But then he got an idea. "77, you have some of Lira's DNA on your dress, come over here." Tenten came over and Neji tartly pulled a hair off of Tenten's chest. "Thank you, go away." Neji placed the hair on the pad and it snapped shut inside the computer.

"Access granted," The mechanical voice announced happily.

A series of screens popped up with various headlines.

Uranium Plant Explodes in Freak Crash

The Benefits of Nuclear Power

Harvesting Chemicals

…Cockney Rhyming Slang? (Maybe it was for a secret way of speaking to each other?)

Chaos: Join the Fight

And the Control Database of Agents?

"77, look at this." Neji said, pointing at the Control Database.

"How'd they get their unsharpened little claws on this? We need to delete it!" Tenten cried.

"No, we can't alter anything on this computer," Neji disagreed, leaning back in the chair he sat in.

A new voice interrupted the conversation. "Agents 77 and 46. A pleasure to see you."

* * *

That's the end of the first part, now, the next one won't be the continuation. It'll come back randomly.

I'd like some reviews 'cause; 1, this is really long. 2, it took me a while to write, and 3, I really like reviews.

Anyone who does gets a cookie, handmade by Neji. So…you get free lumps of burnt stuff!

GO BURNT COOKIES!!

-Rose


	11. In a Foreign Time

* * *

Eleven: Neji has fond memories. They make him cry. (Y'know, sitting-in-the-shower-alone-and-naked-biting-your-knees kind of crying.) That's alright though. Tenten swears that none of it happened, either.

Thankies for ye reviews! Loveth you all!

Um, sorry.

Anyway, I'm holding you all up. Read on!

* * *

_Mes Uno_

"Wow. That's a bit awkward. Besides, how'd this happen anyway?" Tenten said blankly, staring at the plus sign.

"Well…it all started when I-" Neji began, smirking.

"Not what I meant, smartass." Tenten replied tartly.

"Well, I guess this is going to be a few painful months of my life." Neji muttered.

Neji's sarcasm fell on deaf ears. "I can't believe we're having kids."

…

…

…

_Mois Deux_

"Neji, can you come over here?" Tenten called from the bathroom.

"Sure."

"What is that? What is that?" Tenten said nervously. Neji peered over the sink to look.

"That is a spider, Tenten."

"OH MY GOD! A SPIDER? KILLITKILLITKILLITKILLIT…_KILL_ _IT!" _Tenten shrieked, hopping onto the seat of the toilet.

"But you love arachnids-" Neji began, but was cut off.

"I HATE EIGHT-LEGGED THINGS! God, Neji, kill it!"

"Fine, fine, cool off will you!" Neji gave in, squishing the spider with his finger.

"My _hero_!" Tenten swooned, hugging Neji.

She stopped and sniffed Neji's shirt. "Wait, I smell perfume! It's not my Pink Sugar!"

"I was…" Neji began, but was cut off. Interrupting people was one of Pregnant Tenten's habits.

'_Talking to Hinata who wears this fancy perfume that Naruto gave her, when she patted my shoulder…'_

"Oh my God! Are you having an affair?" Tenten accused.

"What?" Neji tried to intervene.

"You went off with some skank, after getting me pregnant?"

"What skank? Tenten, are you okay?"

"Don't play stupid with me Hyuuga, I can feel it." Tenten glared and pointed in his face.

"Tenten! You're talking like some insane shut-in!"

Neji ended up in the basement that night. It was pretty damn scary down there too.

…

…

…

_Monat Drei_

It was in the disturbingly serene period of time with Tenten, (i.e., not accusing Neji of cheating, or acting generally disturbing), that Tenten had an ultrasound.

Neji said it was odd.

Tenten said it looked like a tiger cub in a brawl…with a goat?

So…two?

Twins?

Awkward…

Tenten patted her stomach, and then she burped. "Oh my,"

Sakura stared and so did Neji.

"Excuse me…god!" Tenten said, scoffing.

"I worry for both of you," Sakura said mock solemnly then laughed. Neji squinted and murmured, "I worry too…" He shuddered.

"Any of you guys have calamari? I love calamari!" Tenten said gleefully.

So…maybe not so serene.

…

…

…

_Mensis Mensis Quattor_

Neji had just gotten back from a long two week mission and he finally settles into his own bed for once…then…

"Neji! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN! I suffer for a whole month," Tenten began.

"It was two weeks-"

"And you don't even greet me? You hate me! Why would you hurt me like that?"

"Tenten, I'm so sorry! I guess I just forgot! I just got back from an assassination mission!" Neji defended, lifting his mask, revealing his sorry features.

"Oh…well…wanna cuddle with me?" Tenten offered.

Neji only had a few decisions. 1, say no and end up in the basement. Or 2, say yes and end up doing nothing besides hugging and sleeping.

"I will, Tenten my love." Neji pulled her close and embraced her warm body. They fell onto the bed and all of Tenten's unruly, disorganized, yet beautiful deer brown hair fell into Neji's face. It smelled of various flowers, and brown sugar, and vanilla. He inhaled heavily, letting the familiar scent fill his nose. The feeling of home was back.

Neji did not end up in the cold scary basement that night.

…

…

…

_Mwezi Tano _

"Neji, we need names. Cool names. So fucking awesome that the other kids'll be like 'Why didn't my parents give me that name?' Then I'll say, 'Well, that's 'cause your parents weren't awesome enough. Sorry Jimmy!'"

The sun shined through the window, illuminating Tenten in a slightly intimidating manner.

"Hn." Neji grunted, lips curling up at the absurd statement. He was currently reading Pride and Prejudice. (A/N: Which I have only read ten pages of, but it seemed like something he'd read.)

Tenten threw a very large book onto the kitchen table where they sat.

"What's that?" Neji asked, curious.

"This is all of the names of my relatives I have on record! My grandmother gave it to me." Tenten said in that overly gleeful voice.

Neji swore Tenten was an orphan. But was Neji going to question the Almighty Pregnant Tenten?

Hell no.

The book was taller than the vase of flowers perched on the table. Or the orange juice Neji possessed.

Neji reluctantly marked his page in his book, and peered over the book.

_Harukina Saruki, 1601-1681_

_Harukina Sayuki 1601-1677_

_Tarkai Mekaru 1700-1777_

The list continued for pages and pages.

"God, Tenten, how are you going to even begin to pick names with a book this big?" Neji said, about to pick up Pride and Prejudice again when Tenten said,

"Well, Neji, if that doesn't work…" Tenten began, furrowing her brow. "Oh, I know how to go about this."

"I'll pick the name for the girl, and…"

"No, if we are going to do it like that, I'm picking the girl's name," Neji said sternly.

"Why?" Tenten asked, drinking some of Neji's orange juice.

Neji ignored this, (he learned to share anything and everything to a different level with her now), and continued. "Well, I…I just do." Neji sputtered, showing a rare sign of confusion and bashfulness.

"Whatever." Tenten said. She sipped some of the juice. "Neji, do we have any pickles?"

"In a second Tenten." Neji muttered, banging his head repeatedly on their kitchen table.

"Okay, well, I'll wait. So what'd you have in mind?"

"Well, do you remember when it was your birthday and Lee was forced to drink watered down fruit punch all night so he would not rampage and cause generally unpleasantness?"

"Yeah…I remember that," Tenten said, looking up into memories.

"Do you remember two days after?"

"Yeah…"

"Well remember that evening when we went stargazing, and we found Orion?"

"Yeah, that was so sweet of you, Neji-kun!"

"So, I was bored while I was in your old apartment once, so I looked at your star chart and found…the most beautiful name…"

"Lynx? Auriga? Musco? Triangulum Australe?" Tenten pushed.

Neji's pale, lavender eyes glistened childishly.

"Bellatrix."

"Like the matrix?" Tenten said, cocking her head to one side. Neji's reverie shattered into a million pieces.

"Um, no, the left shoulder of Orion. Isn't it pretty?" Neji said, tracing an imaginary line on the table.

Tenten stared for a while. The look that probed his darkest thoughts and switched the books on Neji's proverbial bookshelf, Neji almost shuddered. Tenten's amber eyes were serene, unmoving, and she broke the stare, folding her arms.

"It's truly wonderful, Neji-kun. I love it. I love you." Tenten said, completely monotone, but still with every ounce of emotion Ino would say it with.

Neji smirked, he passed a test.

What was the test about?

He never knew.

…and, he probably never will.

…

…

…

_Tsuki Roku_

"Damn it to hell, Hyuuga Neji! Wake up!" Tenten whispered.

"Hunh?" Neji murmured.

"Neji, I have compiled a list of things I'm hungry for, go to the store and buy them for me." Tenten commanded, handing her husband a piece of paper.

"Tenten, it's three in the morning…" Neji said pleadingly.

"Neji-kun…please? Do it for your dearest love, which makes your days illuminated with sunlight!" Said girl replied, just as pleadingly.

"Tenten, I told you not to read things I wrote! Fine…I'm going."

Neji went to the store, tired and feeling dirty in old clothes.

It was horribly lit, and Tenten's handwriting was some kind of chicken scratch, from a Portuguese chicken.

_Neji-kun, please get this stuff from the store for your dearest moonflower:_

_Vanilla filled doughnuts_

_Pickles (Which you promised me a while ago but never actually purchased.)_

_A Twix bar_

_A package of edible flowers_

_Portabella mushrooms_

_Ramen_

_Cherries_

_And some chocolate chip cookies_

_Your dearest moonflower,_

_Tenten _

Neji sighed a the-weight-of-the-world-is-now-perched-on-my-shoulders sigh.

He went down the list stopping at cherries, because he saw no cherries. Neji was on the verge of crying.

He turned around just in time to see an elderly woman holding the last bag of cherries.

"Hey Lady!" Neji cried, hysterical. The lady turned around and waved. "Hello, you young man! Have you been-"

Neji pounced on her, stole the bag, and grabbed a box of cookies on the way out.

Neji felt proud as he opened the door on the western wing of the Hyuuga compound.

Tenten was sitting under a single light, looking ominous and interrogator-like.

"You took a while, but I see you've gotten everything I wanted!" Tenten said, grabbing the bags and grinning.

"Hn." Neji replied and collapsed onto a chair.

"I appreciate it Neji-kun! All the things you do for me, I should be ashamed!" Tenten said, biting a pickle.

"Hn."

"Want some pickles?"

"No."

* * *

A knock on the door the next day revealed a very angered Ino.

"Yamanaka." Neji said, acknowledging kunoichi's presence.

"Neji. I have a bone to pick with you. Did you or did you _not_ go to the supermarket last night and see an elderly woman?" Ino interrogated, inviting herself in.

"I did," Neji said, and calmly shut the door.

"Did you or did you _not_ attack a woman?"

"I…may have…"

Ino frowned and slapped Neji. He looked confused, surprised, stupid, and shocked in one look. One quick look.

"I did!"

"You re-broke my grandmother's hip!" Ino raged, slapping Neji again. She went into his fridge and took the cherries and a chocolate chip cookie.

Ino glared and obnoxiously took a bite before departing.

…

…

…

_Mese Sette_

"Holy crap!"

"What?" Neji asked.

Tenten patted her large stomach. "One of them kicked!"

Neji nodded in understanding.

"I've found it, Neji," Tenten cried, quite suddenly.

"Huh?"

"Hikaru, because this moment is the light of my life. Hikaru, only to bring goodness…and…awesomeness…and...Well…Hikaru's his name." Tenten said, placing her hands together.

Neji nodded again. "I am happy you've had a revelation."

"I am too! So, you wanna play Twister?"

"No one's playing Twister, especially not you Tenten." Neji rejected the idea.

Neji was also as flexible as a wooden board on Antarctica most of the time.

"Well…Ohh…" Tenten mumbled.

"Hn?" Neji grunted.

"I don't feel very good…"

Oh lord.

The multitude of sicknesses Tenten had throughout her pregnancy was disturbingly large.

She closed her eyes. "I'm okay,"

After about three minutes passed, Tenten seized Neji's knapsack and emptied her stomach into it.

"Sorry, Neji. Did you have anything important in there?" Tenten apologized, wiping the side of her mouth.

"No, just some keepsakes, pictures, _memories_, mission files and such. Nothing I need. Nothing I need."

…

…

…

_Manad Atta_

Playing Go was a new thing that Tenten and Neji pursued.

Of course, Neji had played before with Shikamaru, (who would always kick him squarely in the hindquarters.), but Tenten was one for training and such instead of sitting and playing board games.

"I win, Neji-kun." Tenten squealed.

"What? How?"

"Well, if you wanna put it this way; I've laddered you, netted you, and snapbacked you at least three times each. Don't forget the ko rule." Tenten said, feeling quite intellectual.

"Whatever, I'm having a day today."

"Be jealous!" Tenten said, getting up and striking a pose.

"Whatever," Neji muttered.

"You're jealous! You're jealous! You're jealous because I won! You're jealous!"

"Come now, Tenten-chan, you're just bragging now."

"Why yes, my dear, I am! Glad of you to notice!" Tenten said, shuffling around the room happily.

Neji finally noticed that Tenten had finally changed her wardrobe. Tenten had originally worn tight-fitting clothes and her trademark baggy pants. Now she had gone to anything loose and wavy.

It was a different kind of sexy.

Tenten was wonderful all the time.

Tenten was funny and immature all the time.

Tenten was smart and strategic.

Tenten was beautiful.

Tenten _is _perfect.

…

…

…

_Mecru Devyat'_

Neji sat, reading a different book now, Little Women, comfy and serene as can be. Tenten sat next to him, looking over his shoulder.

"What's this about?" Tenten asked.

"Well, there are these four sisters – Josephine, Meg, Beth, and Amy…" Neji trailed off as a low sound emitted from Tenten's throat. "Ten, are you okay?"

"Oh Neji…I think…think that…"

Neji dropped his book, mortified.

"Well, only a few things could be happening, Neji. Either I'm turning into a werewolf, aliens are about to leap out of my throat, or...maybe you may want to get me to the hospital, because I'm about to have twins!" Tenten roared.

Neji nodded, in spite of fear, and the slow dawning of this information.

The soon-to-be mother pulled herself up, grabbing Neji's hand and pulling him along.

* * *

"Yeah, Neji-san, how do I put this lightly…oh yes…get the hell out of the delivery room!" Sakura said, pushing the man out.

"Meh, welp ish meh…" Neji babbled, allowing himself to be pushed away.

He sat down. In a vain attempt to calm his mind down, he picked up a magazine and flipped through it.

Neji froze in confused shock once he heard his wife's shrieks and screams. Biting a fingernail, he looked up and saw the sign "Waiting Room"

_Moor, war, gin, ring, gait, rot, rat…_

How many words could he make out of the phrase?

Neji pondered the thought, and suddenly, Sakura was back. She nodded, and Neji followed, much like a beaten dog.

"'Sup Neji-kun," Tenten greeted, nodding weakly.

'Sup Neji-kun? Was that all the second-most-disturbingly-bipolar kunoichi had to say to Neji?

"Here's Bellatrix, and that one's Hikaru." Tenten said, eyes closed.

"How do you know without looking?" Neji inquired, tickling Bellatrix's chin, and kissing her forehead. Bellatrix stared, pallid eyes full of things no one knew.

"A girl just knows, my dear Watson."

* * *

Dear God, I end it here. I didn't plan for this to be so long…Well, anyway, (you probably shouldn't) expect the late 4th of July/Fireworks oneshot thingy. Also, this has been like...sitting in my documents for like a week now...mostly cos I hate how it came out. Well, I did it anyways.

-Sorry for holding your lives up!

-Rose

Press button and review!

P.S., I hope I didn't confuse anyone with those foreign words.

Here's the answer:

"Mese Sette"

Mese is Italian for month and sette is Italian for seven...figure it out from there.


	12. Constellations in Time

Twelve: The constellations were hazy and abstract, but when you connect the lines they reveal a darker, deeper story.

Warning: Lots and lots of AU-ness. LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS and lots and lots and lots...

OMG, it's time for ze serious voneshot!

Thanks for reviews…Strife.

* * *

_Start_

The girl moved forward, adorned in her most special clothing. She looked on at her people. She looked on at one in particular, with the long brown hair.

Men were not supposed to have long hair.

He should have been beheaded.

But she wasn't going to.

She liked him.

"You, you come here." She pointed to him, and he smirked. He obeyed, walking up to the princess.

"You called, Tall Bear?"

"Yes. Are you even aware that your hair is way too long for the standards?"

"The Standards?"

"Err, yes. Why do you question me?" Tall Bear said, as sure as she could.

"Because I can."

The fire crackled in the middle of their circle.

"Why do you defy me, Long Hair?"

"Why not, Tall Bear? Because…I am my own chief, see here. I am only here to find myself a mate."

"Oh Long Hair, is that so?"

"Yes, Tall Bear."

"Well then you have…have a long way to go, Long Hair. Long." Tall Bear countered, smug and sarcastic.

_Forwards…_

She weaved through the crowds of people, long hair flowing. It was quite uncomfortable for her hair to be that long without even a ponytail. Not even a braid. She pushed through people rudely, the men giving her looks. The wind fluttered through her grey himation as she sprinted down the lane.

She stopped, reaching the end of the Agora.

The man sat near the edge of the shore, on a large stone, holding something.

"My friend without a name…what do you want?" He said, twittering with something.

"I uh…I want to talk to you. Why do you have such long hair?"

"Well, I like my hair the way it is. But both of us know that isn't the reason you are here."

"Well, why are you in Athens?" The woman said, pulling a strand of hair out of her face.

"I am here because I want to, and I'll be gone soon. Just take this to remember my anonymousness."

He turned around, holding a necklace crafted out of gold and lapis lazuli, in the shape of an owl.

"Why an owl?"

"You remind me of Athena." He stood, straightening out his chlamys as he stood.

"Wisdom and grace? I have none, strange stranger boy."

He didn't answer.

"More than you know…and since you wanted to know, my name is Neji, and I hope we meet each other again, Tenten." With that, he opened her hand, and placed the necklace inside her hand. He turned and walked onto the dock, disappearing into another crowd of people.

Tenten stood, picking over her words, trying to remember when she said her name and when she asked for Neji's.

_Forwards..._

"I do, I do really hate this dress, Neji dearest. Why must we women go through this torture?" Tenten said, moaning as she attempted to fix her corset.

"Tenten, you must understand that you do not have to do that to yourself to look good. In fact, it is my belief that women look better without their clothes on, but that's just me." Neji said, sitting in his chair, smug and smooth.

"You never seem to help."

"I am just voicing my opinion. Besides, all we're going to is the grandest masquerade in all of France. Nothing major. Just that we are the grandest hosts. Assistants to the king and queen of the grandest country in the old world. Tenten, hate your clothing all you want to, we are going, and _you_ will wear the most uncomfortable corsets hell can find."

"Touchy, my friend. Touchy."

"Je juste faisant mien emploi, Tenten."

"Quoi que, tu arrogant chevre!"

"I love it when we speak our native tongue, it's so sexy!" Tenten swooned, fixing the corset and fixing her bloomers.

"Just put on the dress, you loser."

They arrived at the ballroom, hand in hand, though they didn't want to. Tenten sported a periwinkle blue dress, the bodice tight and beautifully stitched, while the rest was long and wavy. Her petticoat was small, first because it was to show off her very small hips and two…it was hard to get through the door if it were any larger. It was a sort of foreshadowing to the style of Gibson Girl dresses.

Neji wore a tight grey jacket, almost like a general or sergeant's, buttoned up. He wore long black trousers.

"Neji, my organs hurt!"

"Shut your trap; my hair is in a braid, _a braid_, Tenten." Neji said, unconsciously touching his silky brown hair.

"Yes, that is pretty demeaning." Tenten agreed, holding a hand out as she put her mask on. It was .black, just covering her eyes and feathers seemed to sprout from the ends of the mask.

Neji already had placed his white mask on. It reminded most people of The Phantom of the Opera.

"Come Ten, we have to greet their Majesties." Neji seemed to float into the crowd, leaving his colleague at the door. She followed, trying not to fracture her spine as she moved in her high-heeled shoes.

She didn't like those either.

The duo reached the throne, and Neji bowed. Tenten waved, and then curtsied. "My Lady Sakura, how are you doing at this fine event?" Tenten asked.

Sakura, who was probably the queen just for her (almost horrendously) pink hair, smiled gently. "Tenten, my love, you shan't ever call me Lady Sakura! Just Sakura."

Neji nodded at the king, silent. "Greetings, Your Majesty, Sasuke." He finally murmured.

Sasuke nodded in Neji's direction, and then whispered into his wife's ear. Sakura smiled coyly.

"Tenten, Neji, please go and have some romping enjoyment! We'll be leaving for a while."

Tenten nodded, pulling Neji away with her.

Once they were away, Tenten cringed and said, "Wonder what they're going to do…"

"I heard something about the back room, and a wall. Something about leather too."

"That sounds like it has something to do with sex," Tenten intoned.

"Yes, I picked that up myself too."

"How did you hear all of that?" Tenten inquired, smirking.

"I have some acquired skills," Neji pointed out, his pallid eyes glimmering.

_Forwards..._

"I simply can't believe it! They believe that I am a witch?" The girl asked, completely incredulous.

"Afraid so." The man said, touching her shoulder sympathetically.

"So what do I do? They're going to hang me or stone me with or without evidence…" The girl replied, straightening out her apron.

"We are leaving. We are leaving and never coming back. I don't know where we will go, but you aren't dying in vain. We are friends, correct?"

"Well of course, Neji but…"

"But nothing at all, Tenten. We leave tonight." Neji said, ending the conversation by exiting her home.

"Oh Neji, you care so much. But the fact is somewhat true, because I am a witch." Tenten said sadly, picking up her books and placing them in her knapsack.

Nightfall came, and Tenten met Neji on the edge of Salem. "Are you ready?"

"I suppose," Tenten said quietly, and started off.

The moon glinted on Tenten's earthly brown hair, causing it to glimmer. Her tanned skin looked slightly otherworldly in the glow. The creatures, seen or hidden, seemed to bask in the glow of it.

To Neji, the moon was Tenten's best friend, for she always looked better with the soft glow of the moon on her.

"Where are we going, Neji?"

"Wherever."

"Wherever?"

"Are you deaf?" Neji replied, cool.

"Are you daft?" Tenten retorted, arms akimbo.

"We _are_ going somewhere, just let me lead. It always goes well when I lead." Neji said, on some level of haughtiness.

_Forwards..._

"These are pretty damn amazing things." The belle commented. She shook a lock of amber hair out of her face.

"I'd be a happy man if you would give me my gun back, miss."

She pointed the gun at his face, then up a little, then back at his face. She shot, the bullet going right through his hat.

"I think I'll keep it," The belle said, fixing her dress.

The man dismounted his horse, glaring at the woman who was certainly having some delusions of grandeur about gun slinging. "Listen, I have places to go, people to see, things to do…"

"And?" She said, holding her necklace between two fingers.

"What's your name?"

"My name isn't important," She said coyly, cracking (and somehow realigning) her spine in some clever way.

He rolled his eyes. There were too many stupid girls these days.

They all _acted the same. _As if they were the most unique and smart woman on the face of this earth.

Frankly, Neji Hyuuga did not give a flying fish about any of these girls.

"Well, answer me this. Where did you get that necklace?"

"This?" She motioned to the gold chain necklace, adorned with a lapis lazuli owl. "I got it from my mother."

"Okay. Now, will you give me my gun back?" Neji inquired, apathetic.

"Let me think…no."

"If I can surprise you enough, will you let me leave and give me my shotgun back?"

"Sure," And she sealed it with a curtsy.

Neji Hyuuga pulled the woman close and kissed her.

She dropped the gun, stupefied, and didn't register the warm tongue on her lips for a while. She allowed the complete stranger entrance, and as soon as it started…

It was over.

"My name is Tenten," She murmured, touching her lips in a subconscious fashion.

"I'm glad to know, my little gun slinger…Oh and, I think you'd look much better with your hair up." The man picked up the gun, mounted his horse, smirked, and left Tenten there in his dust. She suddenly fished in her pockets for a ribbon or two. Two. She tied her hair into buns, still dismayed and confused.

Neji Hyuuga, ruthless murderer, got his first kiss.

Neji Hyuuga, with the ruined hat, surprised the hell out of a girl today.

Tenten, unwittingly and unknowingly, longs for another kiss from a man who could have simply killed her.

Unwittingly, Tenten just got herself thrown into a lot more than she expected.

But that happened a lot, anyway.

_Now Stop._

"Oi, Ino, come here, look at this!" Shikamaru whispered hiding behind the bushes near Team Gai's training grounds.

"What…Oh Holy God. That's kinda hot." Ino murmured, not looking away.

"I know, it's like a good story wrapped into an unexpected situation." Shikamaru drawled, keeping his eyes glued to the space through the shrub.

"Oh Neji-kun!" Tenten moaned, apparently said man being the cause of the sound. Said man's face was glued to his apparent girlfriend's neck.

Ino smile coyly and poked Shikamaru. "Wanna bust 'em?"

"Oh…Ino…"

"Please?" Ino pouted, sitting on Shikamaru's lap.

"Yeah, yeah, we'll go, we'll go!" He said, voice strained for an unknown reason.

They burst from nowhere it seemed, violently happy. "Hey Neji!" Ino shrieked.

"'Sup Tenten." Shikamaru greeted, calmly.

Tenten looked as if her own grandmother had caught her in the act. Neji looked like he was going to feed the Nara and the Yamanaka into a wood chipper.

Tenten pushed her boyfriend off of her like an old aunt. "Hey _guys_! What brings _you_ here to _our_ _training grounds_?" She cried, plastering on a fake smile.

"Oh, ah, nothing much! We were told…t-to tell you that…you are to attend the party for y'know…" Ino began, moving her hands around awkwardly.

"We don't." Neji said flatly.

"Y'know…us ANBU dudes!" Shikamaru finished, swallowing some impalpable saliva.

"I see…" Tenten said, fixing her hair, seeing as it was all riled up from their make-out session.

"So…you want to go away now?" Neji asked, still quite annoyed.

"Nah, so, what'cha doin'?" Ino asked, clasping her hands together.

"Um, nothing." Neji said.

"Um, training." Tenten tried.

At the same time of course.

"Well, I will let you go now. Come hither, Shika-kun." Ino commanded, dragging her said teammate with her.

"That was quite awkward." Tenten said quietly.

"I agree."

"Well, things are always weird with Team Gai."

"Also agreed."

Silence fell.

"I love you, Neji."

"Love you too."

* * *

I'm really happy, just 'cause I finished this. Oh and excuse my foreign language use, because I don't actually take French in any way, I had to freelance.

Thank God for the internet!

But anyway,

Review…I guess.

I'm seriously taking request (in the form of reviews). Do it.

Seriously, I'm not as creative as some of you people think I am! So please… Also, I was seriously thinking about starting a new story...I have some ideas. If anyone'd comment (besides Strife-chan) I'd love it! There's one about:

"Being washed up onto a deserted island"

"Dragons"

"Acting"

"Dancing"

And..."A completely normal thing, in which normal ninja things happen, if being a ninja in general is considered being normal"

I'll elaborate later...

Au revoir!

Rosepetals.


	13. Devils and Gods

* * *

Thirteen: Songfic time! That and I am having a small obsession with Tori Amos lately. Deal.

Disclaimer: Rosepetals (party of the first on this account) does not legally own or affiliate with Naruto. Nor does she own the music or lyrics to Devils and Gods, Tori Amos does. You rock Tori Amos! Tori Amos also owns Isabel, part of the American Doll Posse. Were you expecting a clever one-liner?

* * *

_Devils and Gods, now that's an idea_

_But if we believe that it's They who decide…_

Neji didn't believe in gods. He never has.

Tenten does.

Neji deals with it, because Tenten is his friend.

In fact, it was a little interesting to hear his darling Tenten gab about Gods this, and Divine that.

To Neji, it was a way to deter reality; in fact, most cultures used deities for explaining common phenomena.

So, there is his opinion.

_That's the ultimate detractor of crimes_

Neji likes to believe in fate. Maybe even fate as a tangible thing. Possibly as in, Fate.

So, in Neji's complicated mind, Fate would be a girl. A fickle one, who would plan everything out for everybody.

And then Tenten was there. She 'Straightened him out.' So did Naruto.

So now, Fate is even more so fickle, because she changes whenever she pleases. Fate is in his head, forever changing, intangibly.

But…aren't the intangible things the ones that _never _change?

So, this discussion never ended, and it never will.

But what about the gods, then? Huh?

Well…

_Cause devils and gods, they are you and I_

_Devils and gods, they are you and I._

Tenten believes that fate is a figment of Neji's warped imagination. There simply is no control in wanting things to happen. But, you can help yourself out in the long run.

(Don't forget to pray!)

_Devils and gods, safe and inside…_

So…without saying it out loud…

Tenten and Neji agreed on this philosophy.

Though they wouldn't ever admit it, not even on their graves.

It seemed that way with anything they quarreled about. They actually agreed on everything.

But they keep these thoughts inside, because they are so indifferent about the other.

Maybe it's love?

* * *

Um, telling the truth there, that's how long the song is. Like, 53 seconds.

Um, yes, I have no idea where it came from either.

I noticed that they didn't kiss. Well…this is a drabble to me, so I agreed to oneshots.

So…once again…deal with it, please.

-Review if you'd like,

Rosepetals.


	14. Twister

Fourteen: Damn it, Tenten should know not to wear necklaces given by old antique men…but was it for the best? Well…he's a good kisser, right?

((Thanks for review(s)!))

As always...I apologize for missing lines.

* * *

"Tenten! Glad to see your smiling face in my store again!"

"Mr. Takashi, please. I'm just a customer!"

Mr. Takashi hobbled away from the wooden counter, towards the teenage girl.

"Oi Tenten, I have something to show you! Follow me…" Takashi whispered, motioning to follow. He was short, about five feet, and was smaller than Tenten. His hair all seemed to congregate at his chin rather than his head in a long, gray, unkempt, monstrous hodgepodge of a beard. Glasses perched on his pointy nose.

Tenten followed, part curious and part annoyed. Takashi scuttled behind the counter and past a long curtain into a room.

"What is this?" Tenten asked, coughing after inhaling a cloud of dust.

"The Heaven Room." Takashi said proudly, gesturing grandly towards the antiques, collectibles, and knick-knacks placed haphazardly around the room.

Tenten began to speak, but was interrupted.

"I have something really special, extraordinary even, for you my little bara." Takashi disappeared behind a pile of things. He returned, holding a necklace.

"A necklace?"

"Not just any necklace…it is rumored to be magicked!"

"By what or whom?"

"A faun!"

"A who?"

"A faun…one of the most fun, yet annoying creatures. They believe in mystery, music, and romance…especially romance! You need one, Tenten-bara!"

"I don't need any romance, Mr. Takashi…That's weird, why would be imprisoned in a necklace?" Tenten said, holding the chain in her hands, daintily letting it slip through her fingers.

"Maybe they ticked off a person who just happened to know how to imprison stuff into things?" Takashi shrugged.

"Well, thanks for showing me. I gotta go home and clean my room for Ma tonight."

"Hai, hai, Tenten-chan. Well, I'll let you go if you take the necklace and this book." Takashi sighed.

"What book-" Tenten began, confused, but looked down and saw a large, dusty leathery book.

_Reproba Bestia Dux Ducis, _the dusty letters read.

The hell did that mean?

Someone wasn't paying attention in Latin class, were they?

"Goodbye Tenten! See you around…" Takashi said cheerily.

"Good day, Mr. Takashi!" Tenten replied.

Tenten weaved her way through the clutter and out of the Heaven Room, past the wooden counter, past the books and wooden animals, to the door…

She looked back at the dusty and perpetually sepia store, to the pendant, to the book, and back at the store before departing.

* * *

Tenten looked at the necklace. A gold chain with a Pan pipes charm hanging in the middle.

"This is pretty snazzy," Tenten told herself. She placed the items in her green messenger bag, and placed her hands in her pockets.

She reached home, greeting her parents. "Ma, Dad, how goes it?"

"Wonderful, sweetie. " Her mother said, fixing dinner.

"How long until dinner?" Tenten asked, heading up the stairs.

"An hour or so, dear!"

"Cool." Tenten replied before leaving eyeshot of her parental units.

* * *

Tenten entered her room, closing the door quietly behind her with a soft click.

She took out the book, and the necklace.

Tenten looked at the cover, suddenly understanding.

Reproba Bestia…False Animal…Dux Ducis…Guide…

False Animal Guide?

Opening the book she saw a table of contents…in Latin.

_Elenco Per Empleo_

_Unus…Draco_

_Duo…Acqua-Domestica_

_Tres Tria…Deus_

_Quartus…Capriolo-Omo_

The list continued on.

Seriously, this time she had no clue about these words.

"Well, gotta start somewhere." She flipped to a random page. Surprisingly it was in English.

_Summoning a Beast-_

_Imprisonment by Chest or Box_

_If possible, open the object up. If there is anything inside…_

_Take the object out and cover it in smoke from burning incense. Then hold the object to your chest and cry, "Producto produxi productum, suus sua suum, de ligatio!"_

_Imprisonment by Clothing…_

Tenten skipped that one.

_Imprisonment by Picture…_

_Imprisonment by Animal…_

_Imprisonment by Necklace-_

_Just place the necklace around your neck, and slowly say: "Mei fervens amor, invado mei gutter, mei fides mos liberato!" over and over again, getting more quicker and louder as time passes._

"I can't believe I'm actually doing this…_ Mei…fervens…amor…invado…mei…gutter…mei…fides…mos…liberato! Mei fervens amor, invado mei gutter, mei fides mos liberato! Mei fervens amor, invado mei gutter, mei fides mos liberato! Meifervensamorinvadomeiguttermeifidesmosliberato!"_

Dissatisfied with her wishful thinking, Tenten mentally slapped herself and placed her hand on the necklace.

Suddenly, her hand seemed glued to the chain, and a sudden burst of wind gusted in her room picking anything not bolted to the wall or floor. Things flew past her head, whizzing by.

"Is this how it ends?" Tenten muttered. She was hit in the face with a left shoe.

A tornado had seemed to form in the middle of the room. Suddenly, the soothing sound of a flute (or something) filled her ears and everything went black.

…

"Jesus Christmas…" Tenten yawned, rubbing her head. She was on the floor, her shirt was ripped and torn in several places, the necklace was still around her neck, and her head was throbbing. The flute was back, accompanied by an angelic voice.

"The maiden lay on the ground

Her beauty unsurpassed

She is not in the world of wake

She sleeps in a dream

She sleeps in a dream…

O maiden, you have stolen my heart

For you have saved me hide!

For you have saved me hide!

There is no Earthly way to thank ye

I would give you all of the stars,

The flowers of the abundant fields,

All for my wonderful maiden!"

"OH MY LORD!" Tenten jolted into an upright position.

There stood the most beautiful man she'd ever seen. His eyes were ashen, pale, with a hint of playful lavender. They glimmered with a smug burn. Long brown hair cascaded down his neck but ended in a loose ponytail. Necklaces gathered at his chest, various charms and stones hanging coolly.

His chest…

No shirt was present, showing off his muscular arms, one of which was holding some kind of instrument. Even though it was dim, he seemed to glisten. There was an evident six pack going on. Tenten stared to admire. Then she looked down.

Furry, furry deer legs.

Suddenly, it clicked.

"_It is rumored to be magicked!"_

"_By what or whom?"_

"_A faun!"_

"_A faun?"_

"You're a…a…faun?"

He bowed slightly. "Yes. My name is Rowan. And my mate is Fox."

"You're a hippie?"

Rowan frowned. "A what?"

"Never mind."

"What is your name, fair maiden of torn clothing?"

"My name is Tenten, Rowan. Y'know, you won't fit in well with that name."

"I will not? Rowan is a very common name where I come from!" Rowan defended.

"Let me guess…so is Fox. Well, it's not normal in Konoha, babe. I'm taking the liberty of changing your name for you. Your name is…Neji."

"Ne…Neji?" Rowan said, letting the syllables roll off of his tongue, tasting the name.

"Yes, mi'love. You're Neji." Tenten said slowly.

"Can't we dance instead of talk?" Rowan (or was it Neji?) said, holding his Pan pipes up.

"No."

"But I love you!" Neji whined, setting a pitch on his pipes.

"Don't you dare break into song!" Tenten said sharply.

"Fine…"

Tenten turned around and tried to formulate a plan.

'_I have unwittingly awoken a faun…God knows how old…from a pendant that I got from Mr. Takashi…Rowan, who is now Neji Hyuuga (mostly because he reminded me of my friend Hinata Hyuuga) acts like a hippie, and that needs to change…he is beautiful, and I already think of him as a foreign boyfriend._

_I love him…creepy…God I'm a freak…_

_I need to either hide him, or make him look manly enough to bring him together. But that'll bring a whole 'nother round of complications up. He needs to stop randomly bursting out in song too._

_But his singing voice is godly._

_I know from lots of internet boredom that fauns don't enjoy clothing unless it's necessary. I don't mind, of course…'_

Chomp…chomp…chomp…

'_Oh Holy God, my rare orchids!' _Tenten slowly turned around and saw Neji tearing her orchids apart.

"Fuck! Neji!" Tenten groaned. Neji looked up innocently, mouth full of leaves and petals.

"Tenten? Who's up there and what're you doing?" Her father demanded sharply from downstairs.

"Nothing! Nothing, father!" Tenten reassured. Then lowering her voice she addressed the mythical creature. "Neji. Spit it out."

He swallowed. "Ooh la la, Tenten. I didn't know you felt that way about me! I wouldn't mind screaming your name when…" Neji reminisced about her earlier comment.

"Enough, Lover Boy. Please wear these pants, and this shirt…and these shoes!" Tenten exclaimed, fearing that her father would bust in at any moment.

"Oh, fine!" He pulled on the old shirt, an Abercrombie and Fitch one Shikamaru left at her house once, a pair of her college brother's jeans, and some Converses to cover up his cute hooves.

"You look modern!"

I drilled the ground rules into his skull, and confiscated his pipes.

Time to meet my parents for dinner!

Random guy who wasn't here when I entered the house meet my parents. My parents meet random guy who wasn't here when I entered the house.

"Ma, Pa, meet, Row- no, no, this is Neji Hyuuga, and he's from…England."

"Why's he here?" Her father demanded flatly, folding his arms.

"Foreign…Student…Project…Yeah, foreign project. He'll be here for a while."

"Oh, how quaint! This is so wonderful! Aren't you just a little sweetie, Neji?" Her mother cooed, pinching his cheek and giggling.

Neji smirked, just taking in the love.

"I don't like him already…" Tenten's father muttered to himself.

Neji's eyes lit up. "Why don't we play Twister?" He cried, touching Tenten's hand.

"I _don't know." _Father said.

"Oh MEH, Hanamaru! Why not?" Tenten's mother said.

"Fine…" Hanamaru looked up at the gods and asked them why they torture him like this.

Tenten reluctantly picked up the Twister mat and flattened it out on the hardwood floor.

Hanamaru snatched the spinner from his daughter, fuming, may I add. "Left foot blue," he snarled.

…Ten minutes later…

Officially, Tenten's mother had dropped out two calls in.

It was; left foot blue, right foot blue, right hand green, left hand green.

Peachy.

And it just so happened that Neji found himself on top of Tenten. Hanamaru looked very, well, squinty. Because of his own rules, ("Only pansies can lie on the ground!") his daughter and a boy she just met were touching in inappropriate places. Tenten put herself into a backhand-spring, so their hips touched.

Peachy.

"Right hand red, I'm going to the bathroom." Hanamaru said monotonously, leaving the two teens in the living room.

Neji put his hand out behind Tenten's head, as if reaching for red, but suddenly, gently, pulled the girl's head to his, closing the scant few inches between their lips. Shocked, she just was sitting there. Then, she noticed his tongue on her lips, possibly begging for entrance. Letting him inside, she let him explore her cavern as she ventured into his.

Neji tasted like strawberries and grapes.

The inside of Neji's cheek was slightly cold, and with a touch it was warm. She suddenly moaned, and this provoked the faun to continue. Neji lowered himself, forgetting about the game they played.

Tenten pulled away, smiling. She licked his nose. Then…she growled and slapped him so hard he fell off of her.

"Hey! I'm a lover, not a fighter!" Neji raised his hands in defense.

"Don't try doing that again! You won't win me over like that, you've…uh, already got a mate! Yeah!"

"But my dear little flower, Fox may be gone for all I know! I have to forgive and forget, move on to newer things. Like you. You are wonderful, Tenten."

"What're gonna do, marry me?"

"No! Who does that?" Neji asked, standing up.

"Some much to learn…" Tenten shook her head.

Suddenly she felt warm breath tickle her ears. Oh God…what now?

"Tenten, my dear, I would bring you with me anywhere

You are just like a shooting star, bright and unaware

So proud and bold, you are like a Lady of Wind!

Gusting and free, like leaves in a tree, who never rescind

Lo, the wind shifts and sets unseen things ablaze.

Behold, I love, more so than my lute or lyre

The gods hath bestow their darling looks

Upon your heavenly body

Love me, Tenten

Love me, Tenten!

I know you may find me horrendous…

But my legs are quite masculine…" The faun kissed me on the neck.

I wipe off my grin and turn back to him. "We just met, Neji. Ease off on the love. I think it's time for dinner, Faun Boy."

Neji smirked. "This is going to be quite enjoyable."

* * *

Fucking crap.

Where did that come from?!

I don't know!?

Eeeeehhhh!

But anywho, there is double kissage…technically… Well, catch you later..

Rosepetals…

P.S….Anyone wanna tell me their favorite musical?


	15. Rulebreaking in the Rain

Fifteen: Okay, so, a lot of stuff happened…but they never forget the day they met.

Thanks Strife…I guess.

Double awesomeness thanks to: SMOKe13 for shoving an idea in my face.

I loves you for that! Warning: LOTS OF SEVEN YEAR OLD YOUNG LOVE! …AKA cheesiness out the wazoo. Also…the awaited continuation of the Spy Chapter IS coming…soon…

Soon…GRASSHOPPAH!

Onward ho!

* * *

The lightning struck the ground like an inefficient assassin. Thunder boomed like hammers hitting a steel wall. The wind howled like a crazed wolf.

And the rain?

The rain pounded and thumped, coming from everywhere, drenching everything with a refreshing flourish.

As an effect, the day seemed to halt slightly. The majority of the academy days were held outside, so the training was affected greatly.

Tenten looked out the window, bored as can be. Rain splattered against the window.

It was peaceful.

Rain was peaceful.

She liked it and…

"Excuse me, that's my window." A voice called politely. Tenten swiveled around and observed the boy.

"Um, yeah, windows don't belong to people, lady." Tenten replied, an innocent lisp accenting her voice.

"I'm a boy, you jerk!" Neji corrected, folding his arms.

"Well either way, I'm using your window!" Tenten pouted, turning back to the rain.

Neji wasn't one to be outdone on these kinda things.

No sir!

He took a seat next to the girl.

"We're sharing now." Was all he said.

Tenten sighed, knowing that she couldn't sway the kid with the funny-colored eyes.

Silence hovered for a few minutes.

"I like the rain, it's beautiful." Tenten finally said.

"Me too…" Neji replied.

"Anyway, what's your name?"

"Hyuuga Neji."

"You're like the rain…really beautiful." Tenten admitted, blushing slightly.

"Thanks…I guess you're beautiful too…" Neji replied, averting his eyes.

"Why are you being so nice? You've never been nice to me like this before!"

"Well, I like you! You're funny, and you don't follow me around all the time like some of the other girls do. And…and…you like the rain too." Neji was at a loss for words.

"That makes sense…" Tenten said, looking at the rain splattered window.

"I think you have rainy eyes then."

It took Tenten a second to absorb the context of that statement. "Oh! Thank you, Neji Hyuuga. If I have rainy eyes, then you have rainy hair!" Tenten exclaimed happily.

Neji subconsciously touched his long brown hair. "Cool. I'll keep it like this 'cause you like it so much."

Tenten looked at the new friend she'd made. She leaned over and kissed Neji on the cheek. Neji turned two shades of red. "I like you."

After regaining his cool composure, he sat and stared. Then he leaned over and kissed her on the lips.

Holy Cow! Neji had just singlehandedly broken the cardinal rule of boyhood.

You don't kiss girls! They're nasty! Filled with cooties and such!

Tenten didn't mind.

"Like you too." Neji smirked.

Tenten stared euphorically at Neji.

Suddenly, a green clad boy busted into their space. "Tenten, Neji, how is it going?"

Tenten kept the euphoric stare and smile, and pushed Lee outside, breaking the window.

"Tenten!" Neji moaned.

"_Neji! _How does it feel?" Tenten insanely cried, looking over, seeing Lee on the ground.

Twitching, no less, from the one story fall.

"Lee…you okaaaay?"

"Yes…nothing like some youthful bruises, Tenten-chan!"

* * *

Holy Flip! Short…hopefully sweet…oneshot.

((Strife…stop reviewing every chapter. It makes me too excited. Combine it into one or something. You annoy me.))

Anyway…dedicated to you SMOKe13!

Review if you'd like,

(but they make me work faster)

Rose-chan


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